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libramoon Profile
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early summer musing


Life's Hell; Heaven is in our hands

People disappoint.
In gorgeous masks of delight
they may charm and amaze.
Ever beneath
vampiric stealth in the night.
Rude greedy mean thief
too overplayed for deception;
too many days self-deceived.
I like art.
The beautiful mask is itself,
when well-wrought portrays
the best of us. Spit the rest,
the unjust, over-blessed,
tawdry fuss, choking fumes,
whingers shaping wounds
on their breasts, unless
their etchings astound, caress the
ideal heart.
Beatific love, despite requite,
beyond petty acts of life,
unbound through crafted coin:
Art's how we weak-voiced people join

June 29, 2011



Life's Hell; Heaven is in our hands
 
People disappoint
They may charm and amaze
in gorgeous masks of delight
ever beneath
rude greedy mean thief
vampiric stealth in the night
too overplayed for deception
too many days self-deceived
I like art
The beautiful mask is itself,
when well-wrought portrays
the best of us. Spit the rest,
the unjust, over-blessed,
the fuss, choking fumes,
whingers shaping wounds
on their breasts, unless
their etchings astound, caress the
ideal heart
Feel beatific love, despite requite
unbound through crafted coin
Art's how we weak-voiced people join
beyond petty acts of life
 
June 28, 2011
 
 



Last edited by libramoon, Jun/29/2011, 2:33 pm
Jun/28/2011, 6:01 pm Link to this post Send Email to libramoon   Send PM to libramoon Blog
 
Christine98 Profile
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Re: early summer musing


hi Libra,

I like this, especially: "when well-wrought portrays/the best of us. Spit the rest,"

It reads very spontaneous, the energy carries.

Chris
Jun/29/2011, 9:14 am Link to this post Send Email to Christine98   Send PM to Christine98
 
libramoon Profile
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Re: early summer musing


spontaneous edit
Jun/29/2011, 2:34 pm Link to this post Send Email to libramoon   Send PM to libramoon Blog
 
Terreson Profile
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Re: early summer musing


Edit a clear, incremental improvement. Especially the reversing of the two last lines. "Art's how we weak-voiced people join," a much stronger last note on which to go out.

This is the kind of poem I could parse at some length. I've noted before how rhythmic your poetry can be in your personally stylistic use of vers libres, your employment of the irregular line, as irregular stress and pause of meter. I believe you have the trick mastered. But the biggest thing that comes through is the poem's arguement, which to me is quite simple: art transforms and it may be all that does. This is what I get. It puts the poem in good company. One of the best art historians I've ever read, if not the most perceptive, Sir Kenneth Clark, said that art is the highest form of human activity precisely because it is transformative. Think about what he implies. In any age, in any genre, in any form, in any ism what distingues artistic expression is its capacity to, when it does, become transformative.

Funny. I've just read your poem and Liz's Golf Course poem in the space of two hours, back to back. Pretty dramatic contrast between the two truths, with neither being more or less true than the other. Kind of blows me away when I am forced to think on what a funky proposition, and a funkier state of affairs, being human amounts to. So many artists have tried to wrap their brains around the contradictions involved in being human. This going back to Orpheus. Dante certainly did. As did William Blake. So did Yeats. I've never managed to do that in poetry, wrap my brain around it all. Intellectually, yes. Poetically, no. I sometimes think it is poetry's biggest test, maybe that of all art.

Oh but you board buddies force one lazy fellow to think.

Tere
Jun/29/2011, 3:45 pm Link to this post Send Email to Terreson   Send PM to Terreson
 
Katlin Profile
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Re: early summer musing


Hi Libra,

I, too, like the revision. The inclusion of punctuation lessens the spontaneity of the piece but makes the poem easier for me to follow. You have a number of poems that speak to your ars poetica, and this poem falls into that category, and/or more accurately falls into the category of the nature of life as you see it: "Life's Hell; Heaven is in our hands." I like the way your matter-of-fact first line follows that almost philisophical title. Jean Paul Sartre meet libramoon!
    
Jul/7/2011, 9:15 am Link to this post Send Email to Katlin   Send PM to Katlin
 


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