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Christine98 Profile
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Re: Poetry Sundays


Whew, same here Tere, typed to the screen.

Chris
Jan/18/2013, 9:23 am Link to this post Send Email to Christine98   Send PM to Christine98
 
Terreson Profile
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Re: Poetry Sundays


Thanks, Kat and Chris. Improv does not come easily to me. Usually it requires a co-incidence of things. I think maybe I have the germ of a poem here, something I can work with. The objective corelative, by the way, was not intentional, just what brought the poem home on its own.

Tere
Jan/18/2013, 7:11 pm Link to this post Send Email to Terreson   Send PM to Terreson
 
vkp Profile
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Re: Poetry Sundays


It's been awhile but this week a prompt has made itself known to me through the experience of great loss. Someone I have known and loved as a family member for 27 years died suddenly on Tuesday from a brain aneurysm. The heart-smack of this kind of loss is a wake up call for us all. I thought maybe others would respond to a prompt regarding loss of a loved one -- the sudden empty place on the planet where just before there was a living breathing being.
vkp
Jan/26/2013, 12:49 pm Link to this post Send Email to vkp   Send PM to vkp Blog
 
vkp Profile
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Re: Poetry Sundays


They say it was like fainting.
The fade-to-gray drop to the floor.
I’m familiar with that, but I always woke up
afterwards. You didn't.

I will miss you again,
like I already did in my new life
unhooked from the past.

Your loud voice seven inches
from my ear
quoted The Divine Comedy
until I forgot I never read it.

The books you’d pull off my shelves
wound up in other rooms, half read,
lying open, marked with the probing of
your cut-glass mind.

Your contentedness was not a flaw,
it was enlightenment for
our age.
Jan/26/2013, 6:55 pm Link to this post Send Email to vkp   Send PM to vkp Blog
 
Katlin Profile
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Re: Poetry Sundays


Dear vkp,

I am sorry for your loss.

Thank you for the poem and the prompt. Both really hit home for me today.
Jan/27/2013, 9:53 am Link to this post Send Email to Katlin   Send PM to Katlin
 
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Re: Poetry Sundays


Uncle

One day since you died
and I’ve already put you in a box,
placed cobwebs in the corners
to trick distance into the equation.

A milky orange pill bottle center stage
where they put your wedding ring,
tugged unceremoniously from your swelled finger,
bloated hands kept hot under incubator lamplight.

Off to the side a half-smoked joint
from your nightstand, left behind after a lullaby hit,
rolling paper gripped in a professorial pinch
between thumb and forefinger.

A jade-green statue of Buddha,
cross-legged, dust in his lap, as bald and familiar as you,
here in your box,
the world’s volume turned down.

Sitting with your body in a hospital room,
I stare at the drool trailing from the corner
of your mouth, a thin, shimmering rivulet
through the whiskers on your chin,
silvered, neatly trimmed.

I’ve never known your silence until now.
They’ll come for your organs soon:
heart first, eyes last.

Your parts in boxes, pa cked on ice,
but I wrapped you in words.
A poem has corners, too.

Gold ring,
half-gone joint,
a god that only
you could understand—

Here you are.
Jan/27/2013, 10:00 pm Link to this post Send Email to magyproductions   Send PM to magyproductions Blog
 
Terreson Profile
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Re: Poetry Sundays


Two honest poems speaking to loss.

Tere
Jan/27/2013, 11:13 pm Link to this post Send Email to Terreson   Send PM to Terreson
 
Katlin Profile
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Re: Poetry Sundays


Hi vkp and Maggie,

What I like and admire about both of your poems is the way reader gets to know something about the lost loved one and what that person meant to you. Grief comes through, but so does a sense of the life that was lived and touched your own.
Jan/30/2013, 9:21 am Link to this post Send Email to Katlin   Send PM to Katlin
 
vkp Profile
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Re: Poetry Sundays


Thank you Tere and Kat for reading and the kind comments.
vkp
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vkp Profile
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Re: Poetry Sundays


For this first Sunday in February, let's do poems about food. I was talking to another writer and we thought it could be fun. Thinking about Neruda's Odes to Common Things. Remember the one about the onion? There were other food poems in that collection -- all so loving and true. I hope this gets some responses. I'll post one later....
Feb/3/2013, 12:27 pm Link to this post Send Email to vkp   Send PM to vkp Blog
 
magyproductions Profile
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Re: Poetry Sundays


So this was definitely inspired by Pablo Neruda's own onion poem. Who new such a simple vegetable could be so thought provoking?

Onions

When I was little,
I liked to stand next to my mother
while she chopped onions for dinner.
I would stare and stare
and let the stinging gas
layer across my eyeballs.

The tears came quickly.
I hardly blinked as the moisture
glued my eyelashes into delicate triangles,
perfect, geometric shapes
in the middle of chaos—
hard chopping, a hot stove,
my mother’s seasoning.

I liked my onion tears,
as clear and uncomplicated
as the vegetable itself.
Peal back the layers to find
a soft, yellowing heart,
the size of a quarter,
the shape of a raindrop.
 
I didn’t know what was inside of me,
and that was what scared me.
Not the onion or the tears
or my mother’s quick chopping but me—
as inscrutable as sadness itself.
 
Feb/3/2013, 3:51 pm Link to this post Send Email to magyproductions   Send PM to magyproductions Blog
 
Terreson Profile
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Re: Poetry Sundays


Well, Magy, this one succeeds in traveling the distance, all the way from you to me. Assuming this is improv, keep it, work it. You got a poem's germ.

Tere
Feb/3/2013, 4:35 pm Link to this post Send Email to Terreson   Send PM to Terreson
 
vkp Profile
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Re: Poetry Sundays


Decided to remove my poem.

Last edited by vkp, Feb/3/2013, 10:33 pm
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Terreson Profile
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Re: Poetry Sundays


Ah yes. The erotica of cooking. Done here to good affect.

Tere

Last edited by Terreson, Feb/3/2013, 8:27 pm
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vkp Profile
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Re: Poetry Sundays


Magy: I also think you have something good here that will, I suspect, expand a bit in time.


Last edited by vkp, Feb/3/2013, 10:32 pm
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vkp Profile
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Re: Poetry Sundays


This week I had an idea for a prompt that may or may not be a good one. I guess we’ll see.

Tonight I am in Washington DC in order to participate in a demonstration tomorrow sponsored by [sign in to see URL] (a global movement to solve climate crisis). [sign in to see URL]

It has been many years since I last joined a “march” (didn’t we used to call them that?) like this – back when we thought we could talk Bush out of going to war with Iraq. Well, maybe we did not think we could talk him out of it, but we sure wanted him to know we thought it was a bad idea. Anyway, whenever I have joined in on a mass movement like this, the effect has been powerful – the effect on me, anyway.

There is something, of course, powerful and courageous about a single person speaking out or taking individual action. But a mass of humanity – or even a small group joining hands – working or speaking or moving their bodies for a common goal, or to say something, or plead a case or take a stand, is quite incredible.

I don’t mean that the prompt has to be political, but somehow speak to that idea of humans working in concert, maybe for a common cause, maybe for a common belief, brought together not by a higher authority but through their own initiative….

This week was also (on the 14th) the worldwide One Billion Rising movement, raising awareness of sexual assault victims worldwide. I saw a joyful, red-garbed singing mass, a part of the one billion, marching down the street in Burlington, VT. You can see videos of this global demonstration on the website. [sign in to see URL]

Not sure what this prompt will evoke, if anything. I am hoping to find my inspiration after tomorrow’s event….
vkp
Feb/16/2013, 8:17 pm Link to this post Send Email to vkp   Send PM to vkp Blog
 
libramoon Profile
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Re: Poetry Sundays


Rallying
 
The Secret to Happiness ~ We Are Happening!
Find what brings you alive; and do it.
(not what "I should" to prove that "I'm good," or good
at being bad)
Maybe meet people enjoying it too;
layer texture to our view,
expand our field of play.
Lather, rinse, repeat
as necessary.
Take it out to the street when necessary.
Do what you need to be
what you want to see.
Do what only you can.
Make this happening grand!
Do it today.
 
 
September 17, 2011
Feb/16/2013, 8:22 pm Link to this post Send Email to libramoon   Send PM to libramoon Blog
 
vkp Profile
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Demonstration

1.
Fierce and benevolent,
the hydra wears its
colorful hats
against the cold.
Each head smiles
with numb lips.

2.
We push together against
the cold of February,
against the cold indifference
of politics.

3.
Longing to move.
An attenuated tango
of stubborn hope.

4.
We are all a rippling organism.
We laugh – against the cold.

5.
Stooped old women,
children on shoulders,
lovers entwined against the cold.
Feb/18/2013, 8:30 pm Link to this post Send Email to vkp   Send PM to vkp Blog
 
vkp Profile
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Re: Poetry Sundays


Libra, Serendipity! You had a poem that fit and shared it -- thanks so much.
Feb/18/2013, 8:33 pm Link to this post Send Email to vkp   Send PM to vkp Blog
 
Katlin Profile
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Re: Poetry Sundays


vkp,

Catching up on this thread. Glad to see it is still going strong. I like the cooking prompt and Magy's "Onion" poem in response to it. I also enjoyed the rally prompt. I saw some scenes from the march on TV over the weekend and thought of you. "the hydra" wearing "colorful hats" is a great image. I think "Demonstration" is a good improv piece that could be fine-tuned/developed if you are so inclined.

libra,

Your poem reminds me of one of my favorite Gandhi quotes. Something like: You must be the change you want to see in the world.
Feb/21/2013, 4:51 pm Link to this post Send Email to Katlin   Send PM to Katlin
 
vkp Profile
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Re: Poetry Sundays


Missed my Sunday target, but have had a prompt in mind. To incorporate a song lyric--a few words or a line or a couple lines of a song you may have stuck in your head--into a poem. It can be quoted directly with quotation marks so it is evident that a quotation is being used, or it can be quietly woven in, not calling attention to itself. Whatever works. Hope this one gets some nibbles!
vkp
Feb/25/2013, 10:50 pm Link to this post Send Email to vkp   Send PM to vkp Blog
 
Katlin Profile
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Re: Poetry Sundays


Hey Vanessa,

Good prompt! If I don't respond to it this week, I know it will stay with me until I do, so thanks for this. It looks like fun.

P.S. Here's an idea: Feel free to post a link or two to the song you are using if you are so inclined.
Feb/26/2013, 9:25 am Link to this post Send Email to Katlin   Send PM to Katlin
 
vkp Profile
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That is a great idea!
Feb/26/2013, 12:05 pm Link to this post Send Email to vkp   Send PM to vkp Blog
 
vkp Profile
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Re: Poetry Sundays


Take This Love

The Mississippi idles by
in my mind,
sunset-glitter liberally sprinkled,
soft air in memory
like a coat of warm paint.

Outside, snow-covered hills
ease between my opening eyelids.
I see my reflection—
I’m getting older.

Mountains and rivers are my seasons.

I picture my body,
as long and still as a barge,
floating down Old Muddy.
Giant woman, eyes open to the sky.

I see my body,
draped enormously across
the softened, ancient Berkshires,
eyes closed in cool slumber.

A landslide brings me down.
--vkp

Link to the song is below. Good idea Kat.

by Fleetwood Mac
Mar/2/2013, 10:32 am Link to this post Send Email to vkp   Send PM to vkp Blog
 
Katlin Profile
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Re: Poetry Sundays


hey vkp,

I read your poem a few times and then listened to the video. Was delighted to discover you have incorporated more of the song into your poem than I had realized. The effect of the two together is synergistic: the poem deepens the song for me and vice versa. The poem read online is interactive in a way that it wouldn't be if read in a book or magazine. Some folks have said that interactive aspect is the call of the future, a way to tie one piece of writing to another, or to other songs, poems, photographs, works of art, etc. Your prompt, accompanying poem and video have reminded me of that.
Mar/3/2013, 8:41 am Link to this post Send Email to Katlin   Send PM to Katlin
 
vkp Profile
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Re: Poetry Sundays


Katlin, You make me think about the possibilities! Wouldn't it be cool to do a series of poems prompted by songs -- as an exercise? I may try that, and I can post them in Chalkboard as I go....

I know this is not a critique forum but I would love input. I am thinking the poem would actually be stronger without the last line. Of course, that line is the one recognizable line from the song (though you are right that I used other bits too).

Kat, I hope you try this prompt. I know you said you were thinking about it. That would be great.
vkp
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Christine98 Profile
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Re: Poetry Sundays


A gorgeous poem, v, I don't think the last line weakens it at all.

Here's an oldie, inspired by a song:

Stagger Lee

A memory crossed the open sky
it was shaped like your story
and smelled of your shirt

It told me Springsteen was a fake, that
Southside Johnny was the one
It rolled a joint and crossed
the room; dropped a needle in
the groove where Stagger Lee surrendered

The shadow of a stetson hat
fell on the lank limbed weeds,
back of the house, the bedroom window
and I dreamt we were
to one another, sacred ground.

[url][sign in to see URL]

Last edited by Christine98, Mar/3/2013, 11:56 am
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Katlin Profile
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Re: Poetry Sundays


Yeah, I can see tons of possibilities as well. A series of poems based on song prompts would be cool. You could post them in this thread, start your own separate improv thread for them, or do them as part of a poem a day during April. Whatever feels right to you.

My first reaction to your dropping the last line is that it would change the meaning of the poem. Instead of a landslide taking the N, she would be left residing "eyes closed in cool slumber". But I think what you ask about the ending brings up a good general question: when is it necessary/appropriate to drop--or perhaps replace--what might have been an initiating idea/impulse/image for a poem? In this case, the last line feels integral to the poem.

&, yes, this prompt appeals to me. If I don't get to it before, maybe in April. What I like about this thread is that folks can return to it anytime for prompt ideas.

Last edited by Katlin, Mar/3/2013, 12:04 pm
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Katlin Profile
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Re: Poetry Sundays


Chris,

An oldie but goodie! It's a sweetheart of a poem. Works well without the link & even better with it.

(Springsteen is a fake??! Well, I never!)

Thanks you posted this. emoticon
Mar/3/2013, 12:14 pm Link to this post Send Email to Katlin   Send PM to Katlin
 
vkp Profile
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Re: Poetry Sundays


Chris, Aside from a small quibble re. the Springsteen line (Gasp!), this poem is gorgeous. Love the last lines. Love the poem! And the YouTube song is playing as I write -- exquisitely raw and real.

Just reread -- love the first strophe too. So sexy.

Last edited by vkp, Mar/3/2013, 1:24 pm
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