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queenfisher Profile
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Re: Portraits of Women


hi tere

yes a gorgeous love poem - totally lawrence - it's amazing how physical & internal he could be!

a man who could externazile & express in such wonderful language - what was going on internally in a woman's heart & mind. the inter-play bet. a man & a woman - the diff brought out so explicitly in the minutest detail with such clarity. i always enjoy re-reading his novels.

i'm glad my post brought out - synergy - another gorgeous poem - very lawrence-que!

so ageless / careless / so self-contained - that to me is the essence of womanhood! those are apt terms & i salute you - in fact you should be knighted for that! out of the three - it's 'careless' that really intrigues me! i find that very interesting! how on earth did you or rather what caused you to discover that? to me it tallies with an innate freedom that women have- ageless & self-contained - yes that's very much part & parcel of being a female!

the 2nd stanza is so stunning - whatever i say will be less - & will not express what i feel in the way i want - but it's like drinking very good wine & feeling very hedonistic!

& of course what they sew together is hardest to hold!

dancing girl is a beauty:

And when she's dancing near to,
leaping clear through
her own looping love-tide
through the nimbus of paradise,
through the violet skylight,
while smelling of wet leaves,
body warm like quaking trees
and tucked away secretly
in the thousand tales her
fluid fingers tell:

well done sir tere!

& yes death warrant - i was so amazed at lawrence's concept of love - in that day & age - i had to make a poem of it. glad you enjoyed.

there's another man / woman kind of poem - but basically in keeping with your subject portraits of women - which is originally my concept & all mine - very mad - but maybe you would enjoy - i will work on it & post.

thanks for this very interesting thread.



May/8/2013, 3:09 am Link to this post Send Email to queenfisher   Send PM to queenfisher Blog
 
Terreson Profile
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Re: Portraits of Women


Queen, your remarks are sweet. I never know how my women readers will receive my portraits. Always a chancy proposition putting them out for a woman to read. Men readers I don't worry about so much. With notable exceptions, and as already pointed to, most men still and only objectify women or, at best, looking for some subordinated reflection. But a woman reader can be a challenge. For her my portraits can either resonate or I can get taken to task for the incursions into a territory not mine biologically.

Careless. Why careless I think you ask. Because when it comes to certain imperatives, in my experience women can be brutal, damn near deterministic, even reductive, when they use a man or even their own children to achieve certain ends. Economic and biological ends especially. They don't think about what they are doing, at least not with their heads. The imperative is what they know and that is all they need to know. This makes them careless, not much reflecting on the impact on a man's life their choice(s) can have. I don't mean this pejoratively. That I should emphasize. I am an artist first, social scientist second, moralist a far third. And how else is a woman to get the kind of characters she needs in order to play out this thing I call her selfing-drama? That said, she is careless in another way too. What amounts to giving up of herself too much, to her detriment, and for the same end: the selfing-drama. I have observed both sides.

As for the dancing girl poem, to be honest the three type casts of women that interest me the most would be the actress, the dancer, and the warrior. In them I find the Maenad. The mothering type not so much so, except when I find in her a certain internal conflict, what with the wild woman still wanting to have play. The thinking woman only interests me to the extent she thinks with her body, her soma, in the way, say, a woman poet thinks. She may interest me the most, actually.

Do please post that poem of yours. Very interested.

Now I'm wondering about something. If the board can allow my women portraits, why shouldn't another thread get started involving portraits of men by women?

Tere
May/8/2013, 7:20 pm Link to this post Send Email to Terreson   Send PM to Terreson
 
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Re: Portraits of Women


portraits of men by women? that would be a challenge indeed! & i don't see any takers here! that's a tough one much more complex & difficult than men writing about women i can assure you!

but i have just THE poem - only it's a spoof - a real mad spoof on Hamlet / shakespeare - i've stolen his lines not bothering to use quotes - who would mistake his lines for mine? but it's about men all right! hugely long unwieldy & wild! so maybe i can start that thread as i don't see anyone else doing it!

& yes dancing girl is a beauty - the lines i've quoted is like a dance if you notice - but of course since you wrote it you would know!

thanks for your explanation: careless has so many fascinating connotations.

let me get started on both the woman / man poem. needs some work before i can post it - maybe a more disciplined version of unwieldy & wild! it has been rather hectic & i'm not getting as much time in pleasure pursuits as i would like!

so rimbaud never went mad - how disapointing!

but coming back to portraits of women - somerset maughm / Moravia wrote some excellent stories / novels based on very strong complex women centric characters - also Hardy for that matter - even shakespeare: portia, ophelia, desdemona & who can forget lady macbeth! i once played lady macbeth in a college production - my fav. role & even doubled up as a witch! it was great - esp the sleep walking scene!
May/14/2013, 4:34 am Link to this post Send Email to queenfisher   Send PM to queenfisher Blog
 
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Re: Portraits of Women


well i'm posting the poem with great trepedition! don't tell me i didn't warn you!

it's called Women Impossible - after the movie - Mission Impossible!


Women Impossible

She danced,
in the play of shadow & light,
arms raised, to form a graceful arc.
The pink of her palms exposed
like exotic flowers:

I want to wear
the flaming gown of the sun,
trailing after me in a blaze of light.
With the sun at my heal,
the sky,

billowing beneath
my feet, I want to trample
the stars, stub them out with my
big toe, blow on them, make
a zillion more,

your turn:

A wry smile
lit up his face, an eyebrow
shot up like a coiled snake – ready to strike:
to make sense, he laughed,
deep and low.

Resounding notes
bounced off hollow caves.
His voice, single malt, went down her throat,
smooth & warm, his eyes like a jaguar’s
glowed in the dark:

writing for me
is a disease, if I don’t write
I feel ill-at-ease. One !@#$ verse
that doesn’t sound profane –
it’s a curse

a hungry wolf
that howls, fangs bared,
foaming at the mouth, he looked
down and smiled, sly
as a fox:

your turn.

Tell me, my dear
how many, out there, await,
enlightenment by the power
of your pen?

That lady,
the one with the diamonds,
do you think she cares?
All she wants is to be
chic

like the thin
one here, and what do you
think she wants? A rich husband
like the one who wants to be
slim like her.

I assure you,
my dear, that’s not the point…
like stalks of wild flowers, her arms,
swept aside all logic, or… let’s take
those two vampires,

huddled together,
conspiring to suck mother
earth dry, stripping the hills to make
mansions for the rich, do you think
they read?

They’re not the reason
one writes…See those lovers,
leaning against the wall, do you think
they’re likely to read the Brothers
Karamazov?

Write like a valiant
soldier, not a tortured beast.
She sounded like a commander-in-chief.
Discretion, he thought, was the better
part of valor.

He lay down
his arms & surrendered:
You win my dear…where do we go
from here? Now you’re
talking.

Let’s breakfast
on Mars – sunny side up,
lunch on the moon, in tranquility.
Drinks at the red eye of Jupiter,
dinner at Neptune.

Then off for a spin
on the rings of Saturn,
all in a day’s work, then back to my
bed…in Manhattan…

Couldn’t have asked
for anything more or less…
His grin had hints of golden sunsets.
Anything else? She mocked,
apart from making sense?

Thankfully
The waiter came just then.
Latin-American hunk, double-bent,
batting luxurious eye-lashes
over her breast.

Cheek to cheek,
lovers, whispering sweet
nothings, she forgot his existence
with an abandon that was
complete.

Sauvignon Blanc
to start the evening with…
Pinot Noir with the fish, Duck Leg
Confit, for the main meal,
olive-dip

with cilantro & garlic.
Later – Brillat Savarin with raisins-
all this with single-minded devotion.
Mission accomplished,
the lens of her eyes

caught him in a tight
close-up brought him back to life
in sharp focus

Women….impossible…!
He muttered under his breath,
the gold from the sun had not yet set:
….make it all possible!




May/15/2013, 4:01 am Link to this post Send Email to queenfisher   Send PM to queenfisher Blog
 
Terreson Profile
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Re: Portraits of Women


Whoa, Queen! This is a strong poem. Moment comes through in high relief. As does the encounter, the banter, and the exchange, all played out with the stakes being most serious. I think you've used a dinner scene before, haven't you? Seems to be a trope that works for you like a movable feast.

Poem conjures up what I might imagine transpiring, say, between a Simone de Beauvoire and a Sartre. Meant as a high compliment. Beauvoire has always struck me as the smarter of the two. I think it has to do with a capacity she had Sartre did not. The capacity for the emotional intellect.

I've commented before on your sense for the rhythmic line. I'm willing to bet it is a sense so internalized you proceed with it without actually knowing what you are doing. For lack of a better description, I'll say it strikes me as punctuated, punctuated rhythm. It works for me. I'm also loving the "your turn" dance like step. Mostly what I respond to is the woman's objectiveness. She does seem to take to task other women whose audience the man (writer?) might have in mind, pointing out to him (spurious?) motive.

This is such fine writing. Works for me on several different levels, not the least of which is psychological.

Tere
May/15/2013, 3:21 pm Link to this post Send Email to Terreson   Send PM to Terreson
 
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Re: Portraits of Women


Queen's poem brings this old story to mind. That and a certain carelessness.

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Tere
May/15/2013, 9:31 pm Link to this post Send Email to Terreson   Send PM to Terreson
 
queenfisher Profile
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Re: Portraits of Women


good story!

thanks for you generous comments - but i hope i've not halted your progress towards such a worthy & noble cause.

pray do continue...
May/23/2013, 4:01 am Link to this post Send Email to queenfisher   Send PM to queenfisher Blog
 
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Re: Portraits of Women


[sign in to see URL]+-+Tutt%2527Art%2540+%252819%[sign in to see URL]
May/27/2013, 5:20 pm Link to this post Send Email to libramoon   Send PM to libramoon Blog
 
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Yes, Libra. Something like that! And not to worry, Queen. Think I got a few more studies in the archive.

Tere
May/29/2013, 7:47 pm Link to this post Send Email to Terreson   Send PM to Terreson
 
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Re: Portraits of Women


Terreson,

I've read some of the thread, not all of it. Skipped around. Have read many of your other poems, many including perspectives, insights, experiences about/with women. It's a very personal perspective on it; it's a brave undertaking. I, myself, don't write strictly about women; and will admit it's a very difficult subject for most men. In fact, writing about men is a very difficult subject for most men. To write of them, about them, "as such" is very difficult. Not sure sometimes if you are delving into the female psyche or "duende", that sort of thing. Or both. You sometimes approach the subject of women almost as one approaches trying to decipher a religion. It comes close, sometimes, to the conjecture of how prehistoric people may have perceived those little wooden or stone figurines, you know the female prototype, huge breasts and huge bottome (flat-bottom girls). Bulbous girls. It's a difficult subject for most men, and I suspect for most women "as such." I repeat the words "as such" because it's one thing to include women "incidentally" in a poem, or just as part of the situation: You tackle it head on as a "subject" per se, and so that raises the question to another level, makes the question more difficult, almost, if not, an analystical study. That may be why men on this board tiptoe around the subject. Zak
May/30/2013, 5:29 am Link to this post Send Email to Zakzzz5   Send PM to Zakzzz5
 
Terreson Profile
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Re: Portraits of Women


Thanks for your comments, Zak. Over the years what I've come to value in you is that you simply say what you think. You neither look to speak to or for your audience, nor do you look to say something "smart." No posturing with you.

So many reasons folded in the mix of motive behind these portraits of mine. Behind it all, I think, is pure fascination. That said, I've been wondering about the motive behind this particular thread. Why put together all these portraits and character studies of women, more than a few of which are posted elsewhere on our board? A couple or so weeks ago answer came to me. Overcoming personal loss. Slaying the dragon of bitterness. Good to go.

Tere
Jun/1/2013, 12:53 pm Link to this post Send Email to Terreson   Send PM to Terreson
 
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So I haven't given up on this thread or the idea behind it. Instead, I'm committing to the board a novel portrait of a woman I named Ena. To be clear, and stated with an absolute abscence of apology, portrait idealized in the old fashion way. Ena is by design a Venus Naturalis.

Please keep all comments on the novel to the introductory thread.

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Tere
Jun/23/2013, 2:58 pm Link to this post Send Email to Terreson   Send PM to Terreson
 


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