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libramoon Profile
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Sunday Psalm


Sunday Psalm
 
 
Am I meant to be
a sacrificial lamb
as the Universe goes about its merry way?
Is this why we pray?
 
If it's only me --
the great and wise I AM
engaging in some self-negating play,
what the hey?
Life is whatever you make it.
So go out there and take it.
Never, ever fake it
and you'll be ok.
Or so they say...
 
Just a philosopher-poet,
suffered to ply my trade.
Brilliant skies hover nigh;
but, below, fading sight denies
acclaim.
 
Somnolent glide, sinuous, silvery stair.
Burnt eyes still, closed to the world.
What glimpse might I witness
if only I dare?
Is there purpose to wandering Earth?
Should I care?
But what if I'm missing the thrill?
What would carry me there?
 
Over the boundaries; into the wild.
Not a safe task to commit to a child.
A quest full of questions.
A fool's 'oliday.
And, have I mentioned,
no promise of pay.
Just a born again supplicant
reshaping the code,
creating the tale I'll tell
when I'm old.
 
"Jesus wept and died"
I always wondered what that meant.
An admonition to us to do the same?
Like, "Life sucks, and then you end"?
Or, if Jesus died for our sins,
did he first weep for our souls --
a holy pity party enfolding us all?
So, our sins have been wept for, died for;
we carry the blood of the Lamb, like disease.
Perhaps His sacrifice would be better released as
happy laughter; hugged forgiving;
genuine indulgence in feast of experience,
balance to weeping and dying.
For revelry balances grief;
ecstasy balances defeat;
and love, of course,
is the only balance to love.
 
Spitting on divine art.
Anger overtaking heart.
Ripping the world wheel apart,
invested in childish rage.
"Am I good now, Daddy?"
Purging my animal nature.
Ripping out the devils
under every bed.
I tell them, I tell them
what you said
about Fires of Hell awaiting
devotion to unsanctified ways.
Daddy, will you love me,
keep me safe?
My life, all lives, for You!
I humbly sacrifice
all life to You.
'Cause you're my Man, my Holy
Truth and Power.
Elevate my cause; it is your own.
Apr/13/2014, 2:50 pm Link to this post Send Email to libramoon   Send PM to libramoon Blog
 
Terreson Profile
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Re: Sunday Psalm


Libra, I've long since left off critting your poetry. Prosodically you can be sloppy. Poetically you tend to bring the bacon home and pierce me. Pierce me bad, actually. This poem has so many prosodic problems, too many line shifts in syntax, metrics, and logic. I think I know you don't get that, and that the problem doen't matter to you. But I got to say you would be a much more powerful poet if you paid attention to the close, prosodic stuff. You have so much to say.

Tere
May/6/2014, 9:21 pm Link to this post Send Email to Terreson   Send PM to Terreson
 
JRPearspn Profile
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Re: Sunday Psalm


Terr has a good assessment. Rule one: don't mention yourself unless its self deprecating.
May/12/2014, 5:52 pm Link to this post Send Email to JRPearspn   Send PM to JRPearspn AIM
 


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