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Christine98 Profile
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The Junior Monologues


Junior's Great Uncle Reviews His Notes

It's not a leather jacket with
your hands in the pockets, worn
into something more beautiful.
It can't take a beating like that.

It's not a deep watered green
glass aquarium dream of anemone's
breath on the back of your neck.
It's not weightless like that.

It's not coming off the field
with blood in your eye
still wanting mostly, to be sexy.
It's not simple like that.

It's one more than your share
of shocks to the system.
It's unconditional surrender.

Last edited by Christine98, Jul/20/2013, 10:00 am
Jul/14/2010, 4:24 pm Link to this post Send Email to Christine98   Send PM to Christine98
 
Terreson Profile
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Re: The Junior Monologues


God damn it, Chris. Go ahead and say the biggest thing in the little, simple, lyrical way. I don't get a shiver. I get something more. The blade between my ribs.

This is poetry I mostly can't find in bookstores or on ezines. I don't know how this came to you or why. This is a stand out poem. Stops me cold. I think you know so, why you put it in Ateliers.

Tere
Jul/16/2010, 6:11 pm Link to this post Send Email to Terreson   Send PM to Terreson
 
Christine98 Profile
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Re: The Junior Monologues


Thank you Tere. Not sure why I put this in Ateliers, but I did think I'd write a few more
in this vein.

Thanks again,

Chris
Jul/16/2010, 7:00 pm Link to this post Send Email to Christine98   Send PM to Christine98
 
Katlin Profile
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Hi Chris,

I really like the way you have structured this poem: It's not this; it's not that. Love, too, the final line of each stanza, which take the descriptions that have gone before, and then the poem as a whole, to a new level. For example, "It can't take a beating like that." Wow. By the end of stanza one, I'm hooked.

Each stanza builds on, and extends, what has gone before, and in such a way, that a gamut of emotions get covered.

What I like best, I think, about the piece is its universality and timelessness. Cool, clear water.

I am reminded of something someone once said about Jan Kenyon's poems: They are simple but deceptively so.

I hope you do write more poems in this vein. Well done and much enjoyed.
Jul/17/2010, 8:26 pm Link to this post Send Email to Katlin   Send PM to Katlin
 
Christine98 Profile
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Re: The Junior Monologues


Thanks Kat. I think Junior has "friends and relations," so some of them are bound to drop in their 2 cents. It's always good to read your posts and know you're around.

Chris
Jul/18/2010, 8:53 am Link to this post Send Email to Christine98   Send PM to Christine98
 
Christine98 Profile
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Re: The Junior Monologues


Junior's Mom Does a Little Gardening

Such a plump, ripping sound
of pulling up weeds
where the Easter lilies grow
asserting their starched manners
leaving their mess of ropey stems
to the Summer spiders and me
with my bare hands in the dirt
thinking of bread bakers and pioneers.
Jul/30/2010, 2:32 pm Link to this post Send Email to Christine98   Send PM to Christine98
 
Katlin Profile
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Hi Chris,

This is light and lovely. The sound sense is just right. Lively without being ostentatious. I like the cap on Summer, which emphasized the noun within the adjective. Like, too, the voice of the N.

More, please. emoticon
Aug/3/2010, 8:00 am Link to this post Send Email to Katlin   Send PM to Katlin
 
Christine98 Profile
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Thanks Kat. I wasn't sure about capping the S on summer. I thought it might be a proper noun, requiring a cap, but as you point out, it's being used as an adjective here. The older I get, the more I forget that kind of stuff.

Chris

Last edited by Christine98, Aug/3/2010, 8:14 am
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Terreson Profile
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Re: The Junior Monologues


Light and lovely, yes. And grounded, firmly planted. The only word choice I am not keen on would be the last, "pioneers." A bit too facile for me.

The summer spider thing kind of touches on late summer. Come August I am constantly walking through these broad spider webs made by banana spiders in the bee yards, webs that can easily reach fifteen feet across. And I have to be extra careful about black widows taking up residence on and sometimes in hive boxes. So summer spider works for me, makes the scene immediate.

Tere
Aug/4/2010, 6:50 pm Link to this post Send Email to Terreson   Send PM to Terreson
 
Christine98 Profile
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Re: The Junior Monologues


Thanks for stopping in, Tere. Junior's mom says watch out for those black widows! and don't get cooked.

Chris
Aug/4/2010, 9:38 pm Link to this post Send Email to Christine98   Send PM to Christine98
 
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Re: The Junior Monologues


Junior's Step-Sister Explains: Everything

including the ballet studio and the Brando poster,
is in the glass globe

Exit through the speak-easy door
arrested for pronouncing the password phonetically
awaiting trial

Everything including Black Beauty,
the original heart-bleed, heart-buds
torqued from fetal stem cells. Everything

but the password.

Last edited by Christine98, Nov/22/2010, 7:42 am
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Terreson Profile
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Re: The Junior Monologues


Still enjoying this not so little theme of yours. Glad to see you come back to it from time to time. I especially like the conception of explaining how Junior's step-sister explains everything, and gets arrested for it?, except for the password. Yours is a different sort of sense of things, Chris, and always a treat to the brain.

Tere
Nov/21/2010, 4:19 pm Link to this post Send Email to Terreson   Send PM to Terreson
 
Christine98 Profile
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Re: The Junior Monologues


Thanks Tere. This is an oddity and you are a kind reader.

Chris
Nov/21/2010, 5:36 pm Link to this post Send Email to Christine98   Send PM to Christine98
 


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